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What do you people think goes on at women’s colleges? Hm? Think we all just get on the same menstrual cycle, trim our mustaches in the library bathrooms and defile shrines of male reproductive organs?  Well, maybe one or two of those, but that’s beside the point.

I told myself I’d never start a sentence with “As a feminist” or “Sexism” so… What does bacteria and sexism have in common? They’re alive.  Both are hard to see most of the time, so therefore they are usually ‘out of mind’.  But when you look at the cold hard facts and see the aftermath (athlete’s foot, Walmart time slips), it’s no longer a question.

Everybody ready for me to whip out the F-word? Wait for it….

FEMINISM!

Phew glad that’s out there and ready to be thrown about freely.  I finished my senior year in high school thinking feminists were some awful, hairy, angry group of people. That’s not an uncommon belief! I’m sure there are some feminists who fit that description, just like some Muslims (I’m going there) want to kill the infidels. Don’t you HATE that the minute percentage of crazies get to represent their group?!

K, I don’t know where I was going with that other than just letting you know that the big scary F word just means that women should have the same rights as men… which is, hm, just SO crazy.  Conclusion: unless you’re a raging doosh, you’re a feminist.

So let’s talk about the whole ‘get in the kitchen and make me a sandwich’ thing that’s coming out of the mouths of many males recently. Don’t get me wrong, there are a slew of woman jokes that I find hilarious. But really? So many youtube videos showing a female doing something is followed by highly rated comments like: “well that wouldn’t have happened if she had been in the kitchen” …. Ha. Ha. Ha.

                                                                         ^ Sober.

I’m in college and there are no males. But I’m okay with it.

Back when I was a mopey junior in high school trying to figure out just how far away I should choose to get from my home sweet home my mom found a women’s college a few hours away.

‘Just give it a chance! Think about it.. Humor me!’

‘Fill out the application why don’t you’

‘Let’s go on a tour!’

‘Golly isn’t this lovely! Look at that sequoia what a sight. Is that a goose I see? That’s a goose, gee wilikers they have a goose! ‘

‘O wow you got in! okay!’

No, my mom doesn’t actually talk like that. But it happened and I’m here and I’m a sophomore and it’s actually pretty great.

Now, I know what you’re thinking (unless I don’t know and I’m completely wrong) but no, we’re not all lesbians.  True, there is a rather high percentage and true, men come thinking that we are all desperate for whatever it is they think they have to offer.  But wow! Being in class and not having to worry about how your unbrushed hair looks or if your question is dumb or that you might be too enthusiastic about raising your hand is AMAZING.

I guess I’ve neglected to mention the name of this expensive great establishment…

It’s Mount Holyoke College out in good ole South Hadley, MA.

Yea, it’s breath-takingly gorgeous, get over it.

So I’m an English major. Maybe I shouldn’t say that incase I have some egregious typos or parenthetical phrases left open or run on sentences.

Since this is my first postamajig, I’ll keep it short.  Lure in some unsuspecting dopes who should by now be drooling for more.

I will leave you with what I think is pure genius, from Madame Bovary (If you thought I was joking about the whole English major business.. I wasn’t):

“…human language is like a cracked kettle on which we beat out tunes for bears to dance to, when what we long to do is make music that will move the stars to pity.”

What is make-up?

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